Everything matters
I think I have 'aesthetic sensitivity disorder'!
Dear pals,
Last week I shared a little wabi-sabi van tour inside of Eddie. A friend commented, “You have me looking at the objects around me and wondering (and perhaps realising) just how much wabi sabi is a state of mind, a lens, an intention or attention we bring to objects.”
Thanks, it’s a wonderful realisation and a perfect jumping off point for this week’s newsletter.
One reason I’m living in a van is that I have ‘aesthetic sensitivity disorder’. It means that I find it hard to be in places that I perceive as not aesthetically pleasing!
There’s no official diagnosis yet. That’s hard. People assume I am just being fussy, whereas if I could tell them I have ASD, they might stop rolling their eyes (then again, my friends?).
Some people are allowed to take a support animal with them when they travel. I take my support mug. It saves me from having to drink out of ugly ones. Actually, I am kidding. I’m not that fussy.
Correction, I am that fussy, in that I know what I like. But I don’t have to have things the way I like them. Living first in communities, then with kids, cured me of that. Living alone, you get to have things exactly as you want them, but you soon realise it doesn’t bring the happiness that a life full of messy people does.
I find the thought of being in even mildly unpleasant environments almost unbearable. I’m embarrassed writing that, but it’s true. It’s especially true if it’s somewhere I’m going to be alone. When I go to see mates, I couldn’t care less about what their home is like. I’ve gone to see them.
It’s a bonus if someone lives in a beautiful place, but we don’t all offer the same bonuses. I have a friend who dresses impeccably, with beautiful tweed suits, polished shoes. Being with them is a treat. Yet, I’ll not be dressing that way. We all offer something. Humour. Good food. A garden. Eccentricity.
But when I’m alone, I feel my relationship is with the surrounding things, and then everything matters.